Standing Up by Hannah Marshall

When I was younger it was always a dream of mine to be a famous singer. I always loved singing, but it was hard for me to sing in front of people. Stage fright was my worst enemy. I felt if people heard me sing, millions of different sounds of small laughter would start, and then would turn into a gigantic tidal wave of hideous laughter. To make it sound worse, I couldn’t even sing in front of my own mother. I didn’t know what was wrong with me. How can you not sing in front of your own mother? It’s not that I didn’t want to, I was just scared of humiliation. However, something in the future would change my perspective.

From kindergarten through sixth grade I went to a prim, highly educated, private school, where the student had to wear uniforms and read four books every year for summer reading. My parents weren’t rich like most of the students’ parents were, but they wanted me to have the best education. I made so many nice friends and nice memories. Then one day I got the most heart-breaking news. My parents told me that they didn’t have enough money for me to go that private school for one more year. They said I had to go to a public school. I was so emotional I started to scream and cry like a whiney four-year-old. I was so upset because leaving that school meant leaving all of my friends, my favorite teachers, and memories behind to never return ever again. I felt as if everything was going downhill and the sad part was there was nothing I could do about it.

Weeks passed and when the school year was almost over I had to tell my best friends that I was leaving. I saw the sadness on their faces. I told them, “We should just have fun with the time that we have together before I leave,” and so we did. On the third to last day of school I found out that there was going to be a middle school talent show. I was secretly excited because I wanted to showcase my talent, plus if I’m going to be leaving soon I might as well leave with a bang, so I signed up right away. My friends were excited for me since they have heard me sing before, but I still was as nervous a dog getting ready to go to the vet. They told us to meet in a room where we had to showcase are talent before the actual talent show. I walked in to the room and saw that my old French teacher was the judge for this practice. Again, I was very nervous because I was too scared to even sing in front of one person. I sang my song, “Jar of Hearts” by Christina Perri.

“Well done, Hannah.” She said with a smile, “I am anxious to see you perform that song tomorrow.” I nodded to show that I was thankful and walked out of the room.

The time had come. The talent show was today and my heart was beating as fast as a runner on steroids. I could even hear it say “don’t screw this up, don’t screw this up, don’t screw this up.” There were other acts before me of course. The first act was an eighth grader. She had brown wavy hair and she wore a cowboy hat and cowboy boots. Since she had a microphone in her hand I assumed she was singing a country song. But unfortunately, she couldn’t be serious enough to even sing the song, even just singing the first lyric she would crack up because she probably thought what she was doing was embarrassing.

“I’m sorry guys,” she said with a chuckle, “I can’t do this.” Then she gave the microphone to the announcer and walked off stage. The room went quiet and you could actually touch the stuffy awkwardness in the air. More acts came on. But for some reason another singer couldn’t sing her song. I don’t remember well but one scenario that have happened was that she either forgot her lines and gave up or she messed up and started to cry so she couldn’t finish showing her talent. Either way, she left the stage without ending her act. The only  act that surprised me was this boy who was going to play the piano. I was so surprised because this was a boy who was very shy and never talked to anyone, and when he played the piano it was breathtaking. The more surprising part was that musical melody was written by him! I knew he was going to do amazing things when he was older.

Then suddenly everything stopped. You know that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when someone calls your name aloud unexpectedly? I had that feeling except it was a million times worse. My heart was beating so fast it seemed like it wanted to break out of my chest and run away. I was walking up the stairs to the auditorium stage while each creak of each step I took made me more and more nervous. I walked to the center of the stage.

“Sorry if I mess up of or anything,” I said because that was my biggest fear; to completely mess this up.

“You’ll do fine,” the announcer said as the audience gave me an applause. I was so nervous. The whole middle school was here in this room, including the staff, teachers, and not to mention my crush, Matt. Everything has led up to the point. I was just waiting for something to come out of my mouth. I sang the song and I put my heart and soul into it. I was shaking the whole time but there was this sort of comfort when I was singing. I felt so free and powerful. My voice did crack around the end, which I was afraid of, but all of a sudden right when I ended, one person stood up and started clapping, then another person, and another. In ten seconds everyone stood up and was clapping and screaming for me. This was my first standing ovation. I was so overwhelmed because I never had this much attention before. I cried so hard. I cried out of pure joy because I was doing something that I loved and I was sharing it. I remember that as the happiest moment in my life because I was filled with so much joy. It was the best day of my life and honestly I don’t think anything can really top that moment. In conclusion my stage fright almost went away. I still get nervous before every performance, but when I do perform I know it’s something that I truly love to do.